Forgiveness session
A day after I blogged about the fact that i found some SC'persons very abusive face to face with me and my surprise to be at the receiving end of such spitefulness as i had a lot of sympathy for them , i under went a forgiveness session .
These sessions usually happen when i am taking my afternoon siesta or relaxing or when i am asleep at night.But this happened when i was having my lunch at the dining table .I guess satiating one's stomach is also a form of relaxation and therefore a ripe time for holier than thous or human rights bleeding hearts to take over my thoughts to insert thier suggestions or even have a conversation with me so as to remove the various sins eclipsing my soul.
These sessions are like a internal thought process and most of the time i donot know that they had taken place unless it is abruptly terminated and i immediately feel a sense of freedom.I felt this sudden freedom,[ that is my mind feels free like as if it has been released from some evil clutches ],half way through my lunch , hence i knew immediately that my thought process till then was being stimulated from a external source.
Let me explain as to what was the thought process that was suddenly aborted.I was munching my food with full concentration when suddenly i felt this urge inside me to tender a public apology on my blog to SC's for the shabby way they were treated by my ancestors .When my full concentration was on my food why should i suddenly have this thought and urge?But i had it and i thought on thus--Personally i have no hatred or revulsion towards SC' so as to feel guilty and contrite so as to amends or seek redemption. by asking them to forgive me for the sins of my ancestors which they would have committed centuries back.
Then my thoughts sidetracked and thought this is working of Karma.In previous births the SC's of today [may be those who abused me]could have been Brahmins and in next birth i could be born in a SC family.So what is the point of apologising?Immediately i felt a release and my mind felt free like as if some load was lifted of it .Hence i knew that instant that my thought process on this apology was being stimulated from a external force , if not why should i think on such matters when i am busy filling my stomach?
How is it possible to make inaudible suggestions and even carry on a conversation with strangers or flat mates like this takes place often ?Is it with help of some special audio transmitters placed near my ears ?May be they are placed in the lamp on the wall or in the calling box or in the overhead ceiling fan.I also guess that either my left year is blocked permanently in my left ear or is blocked by by streaming gas into it or is pressurised to keep it shut so that these inaudible suggestions, conversations sent in via the right ears does not go out of the other ear,and they richochete within making it impossible for me to ignore it and compels me to respond .
At times, very rarely for no reason at all i suddenly feel a whoosh of wind rushing through my ears clearing the blockage temporarily.
My thinking about the workings of the doctrine of Karma had terminated this forgiveness session abruptly Thank god!
When i came on to balcony for hte duster cloth saw a strange young man walking down huriedly from B block and then get on to a suv and drive away.Was he the the one trying to wring my heart and make me tender apublic apology?Did i frustrate his attempts? If so i was very happy .to have made him run away thus .How dare he intrude into my thoughts like as if i am his chattel or his wedded wife[ Till 2012 the only person to have a direct acces to my ears and mind was my husband to whom i was wedded to in 1981 so the rougues who are speaking into my ears have usurped his sole perogative over me] and like as if it was not a inhuman thing to do ?
The next day i started to think over this public apology business that every one is demanding from everyone these days and in particular about me being suggested to tender it in my blog.
To me this 'public apology' seems like a Western concept.Since Christians and others belonging to Desert religions lay a great store on the virtues of forgiveness.Why should their religious mode of seeking redemption for sins committed be incorporated in here?Hindus also believe that forgiveness is a great virtue but not as mere lip service but they act to remedy the wongs and this is known as prayaschitham.
Let me enumerate the prayachitham done by Hindus and Brahmins in particular towards SC's.
1. Why was Dr Ambedkar given the sole right to draft the constitution of Republic of India?Granted he was a scholar , so were several Brahmins who were elected to the constituent assembly.Whilst Dr Amdedkars struggle was personal one that was a role model only to his community to free them from societal shackles the brahmins who take part in freedom movt was struggling to free the entire nationfrom British rule They were not fighting to free only thier community from shackles .There were several intellectuals, scholars , brilliant lawyers amongst the Brahmins who actually took part in freedom movt undergoing a lot of trial and tribulations .They were more in touch with the people of India than those who drafted the constitution as they took thier struggle to the ground inspiring a lot of people to follow suit.They all stood for elections and won their seat in constituent assembly.
Were all the other members of Constituent assembly lacking in intellect, knowledge and that only Dr Ambedkar had it?No ! By unanimously agreeing to allow Dr Ambedkar to draft to constitution of free republic of India they were sending a statement that the first constitution of free modernIndia would be drafted by a SC .If this is not seeking forgiveness from SC' at the very outset of setting up Modern india , by its founding fathers then what is it?
My grand father was also a founding father of modern india .He was a orthodox brahmin who would recite Purushasuktum every day in his daily puja so would have other Brahmins freedom fighters.So did it prevent them from accepting Dr Ambedkars leadership in drafting the constitution?They have all sacrifised for this nation but didnt mind the fact that it would be Dr Ambedkars name that will be in annals of history for centuries to come as the giver of Indian constitution whilst my grand fathers and others who gave the best part of thier lives to free india from Britishers name would be lost in its dust .They all accepted this fact magnanimously and willingly .What more apology do those speaking on behalf of Sc's need from me?My grandfather has already given it in concrete action in 1947-50 doing prayaschitahm for the sins of his ancestors .
I think the person who did the forgiveness session on me would be wishing on reading this that he should have never done it /Hope he learns a lesson not to trifle with me .
2. The constituent assembly of India was dominated by Brahmins and other .upper castes who all agreed to incorporate reservations in jobs and educational institution for SC's.They all voted to make such reservations a part of the Constitution of India .Wouldn't they have not known that this reservation would be at the cost of thier children and grandchildren's future?Yet they went ahead .
The reservations for SCin our constitution which succeeding govts till today are continuing with even after 70 years rolling by , is a testimony to Hindus seeking prayachitham for sins of thier ancestors .
There is no need to ape the West and say' I apologise toSC ',' I apologise to SC's' in my blog when it has already been done in action 70 years back by the representatives of people of India.
It is a fact and truth that some SC's whom i have come across in my life in Chennai were rude abusive towards me because i am a brahmin .I donot hold a placard saying i am brahmin nor do i dress differently from others nor am i fairer than many non brahmin women but people know i am Brahmin women just by seeing me.They ,the persons with half baked knowledge or illiterate show thier ire towards me for having descended from brahmins who treated them shabbily, centuries back.
It also surprised and shocked me when i learnt that sc' s didnot revere Ghandhi to the extent to which they revere Ambedkar and that they despised the name 'harijan'bestowed on them by Ghandhiji!Wasnt it the hynoptic grip that Ghandhi had over the masses as well as intellectuals that induced many to lead temple entry and Sc's for the first time in long history of India gained entry into many famous and popular temples?If not for Ghandhi's deepest sympathy towards sc's and his yearning to set the rights of wrongs done on them in the past where would SC's be now?It was his influence over masses and not Ambedkar's story of personal struggle that made thier temple entry and other forbidden places possible by scotching the practise of untouchability, and it was also his influence over upper caste that reservations in constitution was made possible to give them a head start in modern india.
There is no harm in revering thier role model but should they be allergic and ungrateful to thier true benefactor ?.
But i have also come across Sc men and women who have made good use of various scholarships, financial assistances and reservations in educational institutions and govt and have secured good jobs and lead prosperous lives They build large houses and own huge cars .Some of them employ Brahmins.! I have come across such persons nearly 30 years back.There were many of them who are more intelligent and knowlegeable than me a educated Brahmin woman.In my inter actions with them i never found any rancour or bitterness against me or to the caste i belong.They were happy and satisfied with life and had no complaints about society .In india it is money that matters .Caste or out of caste is only secondary.It is money that confers social status.
I have also come across Brahmin men and women who couldnt get a job in govt or seat in a college owing to theSc reservation policy although they had passed the test s in merit.Why should i go far , in my own house both my sons have suffered due to this reservation policy which has now extended to cover all castes except Brahmins in here.They had to compete for few seats in free seat category in decent colleges with all thier energy,capacity thus,exhausting them and nearly burning them out in the process.
I present scenario it is the Brahmins who are affected by this steep reservation policy in educational institutions and govt.So it is they who should seek public apology from SC,mbc and bc for tormenting them with impossible cut offs and snatching away thier jobs and prosperity and ask them to do prayachitham towards Brahmins for making thier lives miserable and bleak by letting go off reservations in toto.
I read a news item on a Sc political leaders thesis on the effect of conversion of a entire village of SC to islam 30 to 40 years back .He has said that in first generation the converts felt a lot of discomfort but by third generation they were all well settled in muslim community and came to command respect in Hindu comminity .That is, as Hindus Sc had no social status amongst caste hindus but once they converted and continued to be in that fold thier descenadants were seen as muslims and not as sc's and there for had a higher social status in the eyes of caste hindus.Which also means that Muslims in here have a higher social status in eyes of caste Hindus than they have for SCs'.
Why can't Al l those Sc's who are not bothered about making a good and prosperous life for themselves by making use of various reservation schemes but keep wallowing in self pity and carry a chip on thier shoulders that hindu society and brahmins prevented them from getting a social status[though this was true only a100 or 150 years back and not now] and keep on castigating us
convert to Islam ?By doing so they will free persons like me from receiving filth and abuses from them.They will also have the gratitude of several Hindus and Brahmins for freeing the reservation quota and make education and job easily attainable.
Now i am thinking about the person who cut the forgiveness session so abruptly when i started to think about workings of Karma .That rogue cut it because he could not stomach the word Karma and it may have sounded blasphemous to his evasdropping ears Which means that he belongs to one of the other two religious communities.
Before asking me to forgive have they examined whether they have the locus standi to do so?If that rogue was a Muslim has any Muslim publicly apologised to Hindus after independance for thier ancestors having destroyed our temple and broken our idols for centuries together preventing my anscestors to pursue thier way of life and religion in peace?There were and are many muslim intellectauls, poets , historians .aritists and leading film stars in India , but has any one of them come forward in any medium to tender thier apology ,for the sins of thier forefathers?I do not remember any one muslim tendering public apology to Hindus.Hence that rogue had no right to ask me to apologise for the sins of my forefathers .
I am sure that many Muslim journalists read about the way i have been made to feel that i am in mini Pakistan since 201 2 and that muslims scared me so with that audio transmissions tricks that i felt very insecure in my own house and started to distrust my society and govt?Has even one knowledgeble liberal muslim come forward to condemn what some cads in thier community did to me and are still intruding into my thoughts ?
Second if it was a Christian rogue who was conducting that forgivemness session on me has any one from his community apologised to Hindus for converting a large swathe of hindus to Christianity and thus severing thier roots with this country's historical ,cultural and religious past , making them aliens in thier own land? There are 100's of Christian intellectuals, scholars , leaders in society , have they apologised to Hindus for being silent when hindus by droves are being converted with money power?Has even one person condemned such conversions that is causing loss to Hindu community every day? Has a single Christian intellectual or journalist or artist or writer condemned the christian conversion that i was forcibly subject to in 2014 though i kept blogging about it?It is still going on but has any Christian come forward to condemn it and publicly apologise to me?
Those who seek forgiveness from me for wrongs of my anscestors must first be a example of having publicly apologising for sins done by their anscestors over my anscestors and for the wrongs committed by thier community members over me.
Since it is a rogue who is seeking my forgiveness in a sly manner on a issue which could be in no way connected to his religion or society and is purely my socio religious issue he has got this scathing reply.
.
These sessions usually happen when i am taking my afternoon siesta or relaxing or when i am asleep at night.But this happened when i was having my lunch at the dining table .I guess satiating one's stomach is also a form of relaxation and therefore a ripe time for holier than thous or human rights bleeding hearts to take over my thoughts to insert thier suggestions or even have a conversation with me so as to remove the various sins eclipsing my soul.
These sessions are like a internal thought process and most of the time i donot know that they had taken place unless it is abruptly terminated and i immediately feel a sense of freedom.I felt this sudden freedom,[ that is my mind feels free like as if it has been released from some evil clutches ],half way through my lunch , hence i knew immediately that my thought process till then was being stimulated from a external source.
Let me explain as to what was the thought process that was suddenly aborted.I was munching my food with full concentration when suddenly i felt this urge inside me to tender a public apology on my blog to SC's for the shabby way they were treated by my ancestors .When my full concentration was on my food why should i suddenly have this thought and urge?But i had it and i thought on thus--Personally i have no hatred or revulsion towards SC' so as to feel guilty and contrite so as to amends or seek redemption. by asking them to forgive me for the sins of my ancestors which they would have committed centuries back.
Then my thoughts sidetracked and thought this is working of Karma.In previous births the SC's of today [may be those who abused me]could have been Brahmins and in next birth i could be born in a SC family.So what is the point of apologising?Immediately i felt a release and my mind felt free like as if some load was lifted of it .Hence i knew that instant that my thought process on this apology was being stimulated from a external force , if not why should i think on such matters when i am busy filling my stomach?
How is it possible to make inaudible suggestions and even carry on a conversation with strangers or flat mates like this takes place often ?Is it with help of some special audio transmitters placed near my ears ?May be they are placed in the lamp on the wall or in the calling box or in the overhead ceiling fan.I also guess that either my left year is blocked permanently in my left ear or is blocked by by streaming gas into it or is pressurised to keep it shut so that these inaudible suggestions, conversations sent in via the right ears does not go out of the other ear,and they richochete within making it impossible for me to ignore it and compels me to respond .
At times, very rarely for no reason at all i suddenly feel a whoosh of wind rushing through my ears clearing the blockage temporarily.
My thinking about the workings of the doctrine of Karma had terminated this forgiveness session abruptly Thank god!
When i came on to balcony for hte duster cloth saw a strange young man walking down huriedly from B block and then get on to a suv and drive away.Was he the the one trying to wring my heart and make me tender apublic apology?Did i frustrate his attempts? If so i was very happy .to have made him run away thus .How dare he intrude into my thoughts like as if i am his chattel or his wedded wife[ Till 2012 the only person to have a direct acces to my ears and mind was my husband to whom i was wedded to in 1981 so the rougues who are speaking into my ears have usurped his sole perogative over me] and like as if it was not a inhuman thing to do ?
The next day i started to think over this public apology business that every one is demanding from everyone these days and in particular about me being suggested to tender it in my blog.
To me this 'public apology' seems like a Western concept.Since Christians and others belonging to Desert religions lay a great store on the virtues of forgiveness.Why should their religious mode of seeking redemption for sins committed be incorporated in here?Hindus also believe that forgiveness is a great virtue but not as mere lip service but they act to remedy the wongs and this is known as prayaschitham.
Let me enumerate the prayachitham done by Hindus and Brahmins in particular towards SC's.
1. Why was Dr Ambedkar given the sole right to draft the constitution of Republic of India?Granted he was a scholar , so were several Brahmins who were elected to the constituent assembly.Whilst Dr Amdedkars struggle was personal one that was a role model only to his community to free them from societal shackles the brahmins who take part in freedom movt was struggling to free the entire nationfrom British rule They were not fighting to free only thier community from shackles .There were several intellectuals, scholars , brilliant lawyers amongst the Brahmins who actually took part in freedom movt undergoing a lot of trial and tribulations .They were more in touch with the people of India than those who drafted the constitution as they took thier struggle to the ground inspiring a lot of people to follow suit.They all stood for elections and won their seat in constituent assembly.
Were all the other members of Constituent assembly lacking in intellect, knowledge and that only Dr Ambedkar had it?No ! By unanimously agreeing to allow Dr Ambedkar to draft to constitution of free republic of India they were sending a statement that the first constitution of free modernIndia would be drafted by a SC .If this is not seeking forgiveness from SC' at the very outset of setting up Modern india , by its founding fathers then what is it?
My grand father was also a founding father of modern india .He was a orthodox brahmin who would recite Purushasuktum every day in his daily puja so would have other Brahmins freedom fighters.So did it prevent them from accepting Dr Ambedkars leadership in drafting the constitution?They have all sacrifised for this nation but didnt mind the fact that it would be Dr Ambedkars name that will be in annals of history for centuries to come as the giver of Indian constitution whilst my grand fathers and others who gave the best part of thier lives to free india from Britishers name would be lost in its dust .They all accepted this fact magnanimously and willingly .What more apology do those speaking on behalf of Sc's need from me?My grandfather has already given it in concrete action in 1947-50 doing prayaschitahm for the sins of his ancestors .
I think the person who did the forgiveness session on me would be wishing on reading this that he should have never done it /Hope he learns a lesson not to trifle with me .
2. The constituent assembly of India was dominated by Brahmins and other .upper castes who all agreed to incorporate reservations in jobs and educational institution for SC's.They all voted to make such reservations a part of the Constitution of India .Wouldn't they have not known that this reservation would be at the cost of thier children and grandchildren's future?Yet they went ahead .
The reservations for SCin our constitution which succeeding govts till today are continuing with even after 70 years rolling by , is a testimony to Hindus seeking prayachitham for sins of thier ancestors .
There is no need to ape the West and say' I apologise toSC ',' I apologise to SC's' in my blog when it has already been done in action 70 years back by the representatives of people of India.
It is a fact and truth that some SC's whom i have come across in my life in Chennai were rude abusive towards me because i am a brahmin .I donot hold a placard saying i am brahmin nor do i dress differently from others nor am i fairer than many non brahmin women but people know i am Brahmin women just by seeing me.They ,the persons with half baked knowledge or illiterate show thier ire towards me for having descended from brahmins who treated them shabbily, centuries back.
It also surprised and shocked me when i learnt that sc' s didnot revere Ghandhi to the extent to which they revere Ambedkar and that they despised the name 'harijan'bestowed on them by Ghandhiji!Wasnt it the hynoptic grip that Ghandhi had over the masses as well as intellectuals that induced many to lead temple entry and Sc's for the first time in long history of India gained entry into many famous and popular temples?If not for Ghandhi's deepest sympathy towards sc's and his yearning to set the rights of wrongs done on them in the past where would SC's be now?It was his influence over masses and not Ambedkar's story of personal struggle that made thier temple entry and other forbidden places possible by scotching the practise of untouchability, and it was also his influence over upper caste that reservations in constitution was made possible to give them a head start in modern india.
There is no harm in revering thier role model but should they be allergic and ungrateful to thier true benefactor ?.
But i have also come across Sc men and women who have made good use of various scholarships, financial assistances and reservations in educational institutions and govt and have secured good jobs and lead prosperous lives They build large houses and own huge cars .Some of them employ Brahmins.! I have come across such persons nearly 30 years back.There were many of them who are more intelligent and knowlegeable than me a educated Brahmin woman.In my inter actions with them i never found any rancour or bitterness against me or to the caste i belong.They were happy and satisfied with life and had no complaints about society .In india it is money that matters .Caste or out of caste is only secondary.It is money that confers social status.
I have also come across Brahmin men and women who couldnt get a job in govt or seat in a college owing to theSc reservation policy although they had passed the test s in merit.Why should i go far , in my own house both my sons have suffered due to this reservation policy which has now extended to cover all castes except Brahmins in here.They had to compete for few seats in free seat category in decent colleges with all thier energy,capacity thus,exhausting them and nearly burning them out in the process.
I present scenario it is the Brahmins who are affected by this steep reservation policy in educational institutions and govt.So it is they who should seek public apology from SC,mbc and bc for tormenting them with impossible cut offs and snatching away thier jobs and prosperity and ask them to do prayachitham towards Brahmins for making thier lives miserable and bleak by letting go off reservations in toto.
I read a news item on a Sc political leaders thesis on the effect of conversion of a entire village of SC to islam 30 to 40 years back .He has said that in first generation the converts felt a lot of discomfort but by third generation they were all well settled in muslim community and came to command respect in Hindu comminity .That is, as Hindus Sc had no social status amongst caste hindus but once they converted and continued to be in that fold thier descenadants were seen as muslims and not as sc's and there for had a higher social status in the eyes of caste hindus.Which also means that Muslims in here have a higher social status in eyes of caste Hindus than they have for SCs'.
Why can't Al l those Sc's who are not bothered about making a good and prosperous life for themselves by making use of various reservation schemes but keep wallowing in self pity and carry a chip on thier shoulders that hindu society and brahmins prevented them from getting a social status[though this was true only a100 or 150 years back and not now] and keep on castigating us
convert to Islam ?By doing so they will free persons like me from receiving filth and abuses from them.They will also have the gratitude of several Hindus and Brahmins for freeing the reservation quota and make education and job easily attainable.
Now i am thinking about the person who cut the forgiveness session so abruptly when i started to think about workings of Karma .That rogue cut it because he could not stomach the word Karma and it may have sounded blasphemous to his evasdropping ears Which means that he belongs to one of the other two religious communities.
Before asking me to forgive have they examined whether they have the locus standi to do so?If that rogue was a Muslim has any Muslim publicly apologised to Hindus after independance for thier ancestors having destroyed our temple and broken our idols for centuries together preventing my anscestors to pursue thier way of life and religion in peace?There were and are many muslim intellectauls, poets , historians .aritists and leading film stars in India , but has any one of them come forward in any medium to tender thier apology ,for the sins of thier forefathers?I do not remember any one muslim tendering public apology to Hindus.Hence that rogue had no right to ask me to apologise for the sins of my forefathers .
I am sure that many Muslim journalists read about the way i have been made to feel that i am in mini Pakistan since 201 2 and that muslims scared me so with that audio transmissions tricks that i felt very insecure in my own house and started to distrust my society and govt?Has even one knowledgeble liberal muslim come forward to condemn what some cads in thier community did to me and are still intruding into my thoughts ?
Second if it was a Christian rogue who was conducting that forgivemness session on me has any one from his community apologised to Hindus for converting a large swathe of hindus to Christianity and thus severing thier roots with this country's historical ,cultural and religious past , making them aliens in thier own land? There are 100's of Christian intellectuals, scholars , leaders in society , have they apologised to Hindus for being silent when hindus by droves are being converted with money power?Has even one person condemned such conversions that is causing loss to Hindu community every day? Has a single Christian intellectual or journalist or artist or writer condemned the christian conversion that i was forcibly subject to in 2014 though i kept blogging about it?It is still going on but has any Christian come forward to condemn it and publicly apologise to me?
Those who seek forgiveness from me for wrongs of my anscestors must first be a example of having publicly apologising for sins done by their anscestors over my anscestors and for the wrongs committed by thier community members over me.
Since it is a rogue who is seeking my forgiveness in a sly manner on a issue which could be in no way connected to his religion or society and is purely my socio religious issue he has got this scathing reply.
.
posted by K.C. Sujata at
1:23 AM
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