Realisation --diary written on 20 .12.13 -8am

The very fact that what i write personally  in my house is selling like hot cakes amongst politicians and media and what i bellow in anger in my drawing room is keenly heard by many a political ears and  my fast running thoughts  are constantly jaw read from above and neiboring flats as well as by an army of  constantly shadowing locals, as well as professionals where ever i go testifies to the fact that it is my emotions as opposed to my reasoning that is in great demand ,specially in the politcal class.

This explains my deliberate isolation to frustrate me in even having small social contacts with people around --neighbours,vendors ,relatives,pedestrians etc [like a open air solitary confinement -which perverted/autocratic mind devised this reminisent of kgb rule in stalinist ussr and more recently like despotic human right activists of western country mindset?] accompanied by constant hostility [which is obviously tutored but it does get on one if followed non stop for 2 years] to provoke me to display emotions either in writing or in speech or both..It is a pity that no one has the guts to stand upto the authorities and even if they do ,are not much  bothered about me..
Ofcourse the dominant partner in this unholy alliance would prefer that i restrict myself to verbal venting and not write it down --Naturally to cut losses.

Ok this diary writing is not for probing the unfanthomable devious intentions of politicians [by doing so  is only turning my once black hair, white and nothing more is coming out of it]but to list down the probables who could be influenced to talk  decisions with the help of my emotions.

1. Women in power [ofcourse] Specially those who are depressed at large part of time or at a given point of time ,who are therwise extremely busy and socially active.
2.Old men who  once held a lot of power  but now doddering on senility , isolated due to advancing age  and therefore emotionally vulnerable.Again at specific times.Of late even men of my age or a decade older and losing the grip are influenced.
3. Men  a decade or so younger than me .This category truly mystifies me.They are well educated, uptodate with happenings around ,well read ,more than me and yet my emotions touch them specially when they feel cornered or when their confidence is shaken
Just how do they relate to me is truly puzzling.Mind you this bunch belongs to all shades of opinions and idealogies and at times in direct opposition to each other.
The former two category is understanadable --age, nerves etc but this 3 category   a confident lot in thier very prime should beinfluenced by me puzzles me and made me try and solve it  early in the morning today.

Could it be that i appear to be in their generation?Same Popular culture, general knowledge,philosophical musings etc ,yet one step ahead in taking a firm stand which they would like to but are hesitant to do so?The typical dominant ,reckless yet vulnerable sibling or friend or alter ego?
Any way the people cookers who have already observed my influece are using me to emote suitably.Now who is a caged parrot in this embroiligo though this should also clarify to all as to who is actually ruling India.Political advisers with their caged parrots.

My innocuos middle class  neighbours   from this flat complex tucked away in south ,driving in thier two wheelers ,seemingly leading an ordinary citizens life are either facilitating decisions or even actually making decisions that affects this country  for all those super busy worthies  living in super spendour  in super sanitised areas ,who in time of political crisis crave for a feel of the dust , grime and grind of ordinary folks[ mine is artificialaly made] to steady them.

My luck,no no it is ill luck that i have been caught in this trap.If RG jumps with joy that he had empowered an ordinary citizen like me i 'd like to splash some cold water --facts--on this myth .I am no ordinary citizen
resaons
1. My family background--political and scholarship
2.My education.
3.Financial independance
4.My grief and resultant blogging.

I was already empowered  .This shady going ons is an attempt to curb it.

If all this imposition writing i am doing like one posessed is somehow to trap me into influencing ak to form a govt , my decision when my emotions were originally tapped into remains firm and the original one-viz--To form or not to form a govt is a decision only ak has to take by himself..


All those intelligent journos etc reading this make your connections with the gist in earlier blog.